Thursday, November 17, 2005

Table Coaches

It astounds me how many table coaches there are out there. It's one thing to think you know more than everyone else in the room, but to constantly call other players idiots and explain to them what they are doing wrong is just silly. It makes you look stupid. But I noticed yesterday, these guys are really easy to tilt.

It started when I called out of the small blind with 99. He was the BB. I flopped my set when the flop came j9x rainbow. I slow played it, which is a mistake from early position, but I didn't want to take a $3 pot with a bet. A player in middle position bet $1 and I wanted to keep Mr. Table Coach in so I just called. The turn was a K and I checked again. Table Coach checked and MP bet $3. I doubled it to $6 and Table Coach went all-in. All-in is a pretty weak move here, because it looks to me like the position player is stealing, I'm re-stealing and an all-in bet looks to me like a re-re-steal. I call and he shows QT for a straight. I river a J and he goes off like a roman candle.

Sure, it wasn't the best play in the world, but it was a BAD READ, not a bad play.

A few hands later I held QQ on the button and re-raised a double-the-blind bet from early position. The EP player went all-in and I called. He showed AK and flopped a K, doubling up off me.

Mr. Table Coach had a good time with that one, calling me an idiot yet again, saying I only get my money in with the worst hand. My reply? "You're right, I'm sorry. I'll try harder."

Yet a few hands later, he played the following hand.

He's in late position with JQo. He makes a small raise when it's folded to him. A player after him re-raises, and the very next player re-raises all-in. I don't think there's much doubt what the right play is here with QJ, but Mr. Wanna Be Pro at the $100 NL tables calls the all-in, facing QQ and KK. You might even call him lucky because he flopped two jacks, but the KK player was even luckier, as the flop was KJJ. His case J didn't come, and he was busted.

Fortunately it only took a little bit of needling to get him to rebuy, although he rebought short. That rebuy, short as it was, is sitting in my Full Tilt account. He tilted through that stack faster than Scott Lazar after folding quad aces.

I wonder if Full Tilt attracts more than it's fair share of these table coaches? They seem to make appeals to ego in their advertising, with their "Play with and against the pros" ads and the "advertise your bluffs" commericals. If you have an unreasonably large poker ego, it would seem that Full Tilt would be the place for you. But you probably wouldn't be playing at the low level tables, so I might just be talking out of my arse.


TripJax said...

I love it when I'm at a table with GCox or Jordan and - after someone flames one of them - they type, "Sorry, it's my first time playing."

The banner being gone looks much better. Glad it worked...

Mourn said...

For some reason, the table coaches are inherently easy to tilt. I think it's because the reason they are the way they are is that the have some perverse sense of poker justice that doesn't exist. They believe that if they play "properly", they should win. Which is true in the long run but we all know what a junk-kick the short run is. These are the type of guys who are prone to play down to their competition because they figure if it's working for the donkeys, it should work for them.

I love to tilt the coaches. It's a favorite passtime.

dlk9s said...

I was SO tempted to table coach in a S&G I played on Titan yesterday, but I held back.

Ah Kh UTG, I raised the $10 BB to $60. Got a bunch of callers, of course, since it's a) Titan, and b) a cheap S&G.

Flop was K-J-x, one heart. I bet out something strong, got called by a couple players.

Turn was a rag heart, so now I had TPTK with a nut flush draw. I bet out hard again.

At this point, some jag-off to my right (named TopUrine - figures), is telling others to raise and shit. One guy folds, the final guy thinks for a long time and calls.

River was a 10, so I have TPTK and feel pretty good about it - the only thing that scared me at all was AQ, but I just didn't think the guy had it.

I bet a bunch, guy doubles it, I call.

He had 10-10, so he rivered his set.

A fine call pre-flop, but I had him destroyed on the flop and turn. He had 2 outs on the river.

Of course, TopUrine applauded him for his play. I was not happy, to say the least, especially because now I had only around $280 left of my $1000 starting stack and we were only a couple hands into the tournament.

I really, really, really, really, wanted to spout off on this guy, but all I asked was, "What did you think I had?"

He didn't answer, but TopUrine said, "2 pair." Uh...thanks.

In the meantime, I reported TopUrine for illegal table talk.

Somehow I came back and crippled TopUrine, but alas, I bombed out in 4th.

Drizztdj said...

Full Tilt does seem to have a larger pool of table coaches.

Probably due to the tightness of some of its games.

GaryC said...

I agree also. I've always found more "experts" at Full Tilt and at UB, for some reason.

Like Trip said, I ALWAYS fire back with "Sorry, Buddy, it's my first time to play." That always sends them a little farther down tilt boulevard.