Poker Police

I received my Rake Rebate from PokerNow for the month. On top of all the winnings, I got an extra $44.11, which equates to about 1.7 cents per hand. There was still some bonus clearing going on, so my calcualtions are kind of guessed at. I really like the idea of getting $44 for doing something I would have done anyway, without bonus whoring. And best of all, it was at "The Aquarium" (Party Poker) so I was taking cash off all the fishies chasing their flushies the whole time. After one day when I lost $100 in about 10 minutes, I finished up for the month $337, so $44 is a significant addition to that total, BB/Hr wise.

Tomorrow I'll try to post on Rake Rebate via Freqent Flopper vs Bonus Whoring. It's an interesting subject I started with Chris Halverson in comments a couple of days ago.

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KingLucky was playing in my Intertops account in a freeroll yesterday. I know I have paid glowing praises for the often held freerolls at Intertops, but since they reduced the prize pool for the dailies to $100 paying out to 40 people, it's just not worth it. KL works from home so playing poker occupies his time while working, and the more free games the better. He calls me when I get home and tells me to take over the game because he has a bunch of conference calls coming up. He has built up a nice stack of T4400 with about 200 people left.

I still think these things are a waste of time, and there's just three live players at the table including me, the rest being no-shows. I notice the guy immediately in front of me is limping every hand. Since I am "THE POKER POLICE" I put a stop to that right away. I raise every time he limps. He usually folds, probably because King Lucky was playing TIGHTER than TIGHT, which is his usual style. Eventually he catches on to what he must think is a HUGE GEAR SHIFT and starts calling. But by that time I have a huge stack and knock him and his opponent out on lucky draws. So I find myself in second chip position in the tournament with 13,000 chips and just 30 or 40 players left to make the money, which starts at a heart stopping SIXTY FIVE CENTS.

I continue the wild play loosening up my starting hand requirements due to the shorthandedness and lack of caring. Soon enough, I am at the final table in second chip position. 10th place pays a whopping $1. I raise from UTG with AKs and flop both and A and a K. I NEVER slow play two pair, but for some dumbass reason I did and let a guy catch his flush cheap and knock me down to 2K. I'm partially thankful because this pointless freeroll exercise will be over. My big blind is 45s and I figure I have to call when the ENTIRE TABLE limped. I raise all-in and get called in every position. Magical flop of 449 and I am almost exactly where I was before I screwed up big slick the hand before. It's like a big do-over for me, and I'm not screwing up again.

An argument breaks out between the two players immediately after me. One is tired of the pansy raises coming from the other. I go on and on about how arguing over a $25 first prize is stupid and how big boys don't use that kind of language. Utilizing my position as "THE POKER POLICE" I knock them both out. I'm getting cocky now and suggest that the table knock some other folks out because I don't want to do all the work myself. Seriously tight table, stacks of 50K and 60K are folding to 1000 bets.

When we are down to three, I have 80K, most obnoxious player on earth(JON) has 150K after bad beating the guy in 4th place to knock him out, and SOONERS has 20K. JON is obnoxious because he goes to the clock on every single play. That's a minimum of 20 seconds for every call, raise or fold. Utilizing my position as "THE POKER POLICE" I announce to the table and the watchers that I am going to knock JON out second just so SOONERS gets the second place money. Three hands later I get 23o on the small blind. Flop is A59 and JON checks to me. I check and SOONERS checks. Turn is a beautiful 4. JON bets in the neighborhood of 10,000. I raise that to 20,000, SOONERS folds and JON raises me back. I get all in and JON flips his slow played A5. River 4 makes me the chip leader at 160K and JON is down to 70K.

Very next hand I get KT on the button and I raise 20K. JON re-raises from the big blind after SOONERS folds, and I go all in. JON insta-calls with AQ. I spike a 10 on the flop and JON doesn't improve. Knocked out third, just as "THE POKER POLICE" intended. SOONERS put up a good fight but couldn't climb the 230K mountain with his 20K stack.

$25 for hours of work. At least I had fun doing it. Maybe I work too hard at other tournaments? I'm probably just on a roll after my final table at the Absolute $5+1 MTT I made the night before.