Best of Go Be Rude

I was reading through my blog, sort of trying to see what kind of content might piss off my new sponsor and I realized...the most objectionable parts are the BEST parts!

Trying to collect the best Thrash Metal songs is like trying to figure out what was your most enjoyable root canal. 8-19-05

The only thing better than a moron is a moron you can count on. 8-15-05

To be dumber than these guys, you'd have to be rated somewhere near the intelligence of a tree. 8-1-05

Folks that think women need their own tournament are saying that they honestly feel that women aren't as intelligent as men. That being born female is akin to being born with a learning disability.7-22-05

Bottom line is, if you don't have the character to withstand the repercussions of your words, then you don't really deserve to have those words published anywhere. 8-19-05

And it's 10:30am on a Friday morning and my boss just came in my cube and ORDERED me to be at a poker tournament at a bar at noon, so I gotta take off. My job RULES! 7-10-05

Everyone does stupid things, and the ability to laugh at yourself, even when someone is laughing at you, is a fine quality. Even admirable, because a lot of people don't have it. 5-25-05

I will vouch for the author being a mean idiot. - Leathj1 in comments 5-25-05


- on the subject of showing bluffs - But what if he is only doing it to "make himself feel good." So the fuck what? If it is successful in making the other player look like a fool, what is so wrong with that? 5-20-05

I'm not positive about this, but I'm pretty sure if I wore a T-shirt that ridiculed his faith, I'd be shot by one of these fundamentalist motherfuckers with a deer rifle. 4-29-05

Voluntarily giving your money to the government is like giving a bottle of liquor to a homeless person based on his promise to sell it and buy a meal. It's not going to happen, and you must be FUCKING HIGH to believe it will. The governemnt is an addict, and YOU are the enabler. It's a codependant relationships, and you are as much to blame as the government is. 4-15-05

There's also a lot of trash talk going on at the table. So it can be entertaining at the same time. I try to keep it to a minimum by saying "Stop tapping the glass," but the idiots that keep losing big stacks to the maniac inevitably respond with "STFU. You can't tell me what to do." It's really just one sentence removed from "You're not my REAL mom." 3-1-05

Now I made a WHOLE FIVE DOLLARS more than he did in this tournament, which was a FREEROLL, for christ's sake. Anyone who gets that bunched up over a bad beat playing in a freeroll shouldn't be playing poker. 2-12-05

The interesting part of the MSNBC story I heard was this:
The part of the brain that evaluates risk isn't fully developed in people until they reach 25 years old. Until that point, teens and young adults cannot determine unreasonable risk.
Does that explain a lot of the calls you see on Party Poker or what? 2-2-05

And to those who disapproved of my language in the post, Fuck you. It's an adult world and this is an adult blog. Stop pretending to be offended. There are billions and billions of things in the world more offensive than the word "cunt." Get a life and get over it. 1-18-05

Gutsiest blog post I've ever seen, stick your neck out there to defend not only a fellow blogger but the integrity of the game we all love. Kudos! Sorry I didn't find your blog sooner - I shall not miss another post, as you are now blogline'd! - Shelly on "the stripper" post. 1-12-05

Notice for next person who leaves spam as a comment on my blog: I will hunt you down and kill you, your children, and your pets.

You can rip people off with your scams all you want, but if you involve me in your grifts, you WILL pay. 10-17-04

How do I make money even though I'm not good? Because being at a poker table is like being in a group of guys being chased by a bear. You don't have to be the fastest guy in the group, you just can't be the slowest. 10-1-04

I think Party Poker fish have a very specific problem. They have a pathological fear of being bluffed. They would rather lose than be bluffed. A re-raise is an absolute INSULT to their MANHOOD. Re-raising them is like making them put on a dress. They will call with NOTHING, just to prove you cannot push them off a pot. 9-16-04