Expectation

Expectation is a weird thing. I was really cranked up for a few tournaments this weekend, especially the Poker Cruise tournament hosted by Poker Source Online at Absolute Poker.

I didn't really play poorly in the tournament, getting into good situations and pushing other players out when I felt they were weak. I crippled myself when I called an all-in with AJs vs KQo who rivered a queen. I misjudged the size of his stack and the effect it would have if I lost based on the increasing blinds. I'm not sure if I would make the same play again If I had it to do over again.

So I have a very dissatisfied feeling about the weekend, even though I increased my overall bankroll by more than 10%. This is a substantial gain for me, and I doubt I have matched such a large gain in several months. Yet I still feel like I had a poor weekend because of my MTT tournament play.

It might also have to do with how I was winning. It seemed like every NL game I played in I got busted almost immediately, then came back in a big way. So I constantly felt like I was fighting my way back, when in fact I really fought back easily and made big strides into profit.

SNGs also seem to feel fairly unrewarding. I won one easily, covering the table when there were still 5 players left at one on Full Tilt Poker. Another few seconds and thirds thrown in for a nice overall profit, but that one game where your KK lost when 22 flopped a full house and you finished in eighth out of nine really sticks in your craw. Shouldn't you have figured out you were beat?

It's bad when winning in ring games is unfulfilling, because that's where the real money is. Scoring big in an MTT is great, but that kind of success is so infrequent that you better not count on it to make your poker play satisfying.

Maybe I need to cash out my $400 that I won this weekend and buy something to remind myself that winning money in ring games is what poker is really all about. As long as you can beat the ring games, the rest is all gravy.

You might be a donkey if....

In deference to Jeff Foxworthy, I have collected ACTUAL posts from ACTUAL blogs from people who probably should NOT be playing poker.

I decided I was going to find some poker blogs for "less than" successful players out there this morning, and I found some of the things they wrote ASTOUNDING. Most of them should have raised HUGE red flags, unless they were posted sarcastically. Based on the rest of the blogs, I have to assume they were being completely seroius.

If you have ever said or thought one or more of these things, you should seriously consider whether poker is really for you.

So here are the top 16 things I read in poker blogs this morning that made me think that these people might not be cut out for playing poker:


1. Mom knows about my gambling problem but she mostly keeps her mouth shut about it. She always reminds me of what it did to my daddy. But I already logged back in today and played a few hands...

2. I only got $1350 for the Taurus, but that was enough to get me back to the poker tables. If I hit a good run of cards, I can pay some bills and get a better car.

3. I should have walked away right there. Then I hit a bad run of cards and my buddy pulled me out of there...

4. I rolled $60 worth of pennies I had collected over the years and deposited the money into online poker rooms.

5. I haven't told my therapist about my poker problem because she'll just try and talk me out of playing.

6. I have been banned from at least three online poker rooms because of what I type in the chat window whenever I lose.

7. I wanted to throw my monitor through the window, but I still owe my landlord $245 from the last time I did that

8. I can take it as a shot with no EXCPECTATION of winning, just a little hope to get lucky, and when I lose I can deal with it no problem.

9. I have lost patience in doing things the “right” way.. I just feel like I should explore other avenues of thinking sometimes.. Who can say what way is the right way? If I am going to be a maniac I might as well embrace it.

10. I have BEYOND a doubt the WORSE luck of ANYONE EVER! If I had normal person luck, I would be winning twice as many tourneys.

11. SO then I am so fucking pissed off I take my last 460 bucks and put it on a 30/60 table.

12. Play 2/4. Lose 150. Play 5/10. Lose 250. Play 20/40...

13. I decided to take $500 and 'invest' into some higher stakes...(Current Bankroll - $758)

14. I am on a downward spiral and lost another $246 yesterday...I was playing a little out of my bankroll(5/10), but nothing major. (Current Bankroll - $638)

15. I lost about $230 at the $5/$10 tables on pokerstars and lost another $130 at the $100 NL tables on Partypoker.(Current Bankroll - $884)

16. I found out that Bon Jovi is coming here on Valentines Day next year and tickets go on sell tomorrow so I'm definitely taking my wife to that.(I know this one isn't poker related, but still....this person might need SERIOUS help.)

On the shoulders of giants...

I was reading around the Blogosphere (I know, blogs are gay, and words that start with Blogo- are even gayer....flaming perhaps) and I realized that the only reason many blogs, including mine, get any attention at all is because of the fantastic work done by others who ACTUALLY put words together that are worthy of attention and praise. The rest of us just get clicks because people are hoping to get a sliver of the same thing they read from these giants.

King of these are Pauly of The Tao of Poker and The Tao of Pauly.

Seriously, I read what to him is just a recounting of his day hanging out with Grubby and Poker Prof and I am truly mesmerized. Even when he's just posting about what they ATE. This is the writing he does IN BETWEEN the writing he does that he actually gets paid for. I've said before that it feels like stealing, and I still feel that way. It transports you, makes you want to be there, have a beer and hang out. Especially when you are trapped in cubicle hell every day at 5:30 in the morning.

And the same goes for the aforementioned Grubby. The pictures they paint with words are far from rose colored....sometimes they are harsh and depressing. But that doesn't make me any less envious of their lives. All it does is make me more envious of their ability to write, and their ability to transport people into their world, if only for a few moments of the day.

I suspect these guys know they have a gift of some sort, but I don't think they know how special it really is. They live life the way they do, and turn around and share that life in a meaningful way, with no reward except for our sincere gratitude. The gratitude of a few folks who not only take pleasure in reading them, but get to ride a bit on their coattails, stealing the occasional reader who would undoubtedly be disappointed by a direct comparison.

Here's to you guys. We owe you. Big time.

The man is simply brilliant

How can he be simple and brilliant at the same time? I don't know, but he pulls it off.

From Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert:

When I see news stories about people all over the world who are
experiencing hardships, I worry about them, and I rack my brain
wondering how I can make a difference. So I decided to start my own
blog. That way I won’t have time to think about other people.

People who are trying to decide whether to create a blog or not go
through a thought process much like this:

1. The world sure needs more of ME.
2. Maybe I’ll shout more often so that people nearby can experience
the joy of knowing my thoughts.
3. No, wait, shouting looks too crazy.
4. I know – I’ll write down my daily thoughts and badger people to read them.
5. If only there was a description for this process that doesn’t
involve the words egomaniac or unnecessary.
6. What? It’s called a blog? I’m there!

The blogger’s philosophy goes something like this:

Everything that I think about is more fascinating than the crap in your head.

The beauty of blogging, as compared to writing a book, is that no
editor will be interfering with my random spelling and grammar, my
complete disregard for the facts, and my wandering sentences that
seem to go on and on and never end so that you feel like you need to
take a breath and clear your head before you can even consider making
it to the end of the sentence that probably didn’t need to be written
anyhoo.

If that doesn’t inspire you to read my blog, I don’t know what will.
You can find the Dilbert Blog at

http://dilbertblog.typepad.com/

Poker Comic #45

Poker Comic brought to you by Poker Source Online. Click to find out how to get free gifts for playing online poker at sites like Absolute Poker, PokerRoom.com and Full Tilt Poker!

Full Tilt PSO Promotion

What an adventure filled weekend!

The first bit of excitement came on Saturday when Full Tilt Poker made me a lovely offer. I see from many other blogs that they are embracing the blogger community in a big way! But the problem was I didn't have a Full Tilt account yet. So I signed up via Poker Source Online. I intended to sign up long ago, but procrastination got the better of me.

What a mistake! I began the Full Tilt promotion on Saturday while I was cooking dinner for my parents who are in town for a visit. My sauce takes about an hour and a half to cook, so I had an hour to burn until I had to work on the salad and garlic bread and get the pasta started. So I signed up and got started at Full Tilt.

I had the promotion halfway finished playing $.50/$1.00 No Limit Hold Em for that hour. The tables were very tight compared to most aquariums, but there were still enough hands were people stacked off against each other that Full Tilt Points came quickly. You need 200 Full Tilt Points to finish the promotion, and you get one point per $1 in rake. There were plenty of hands raked $3, and every hand that saw a flop raked something, so the fractions of points added up very quickly.

Sunday I bombed out of the PokerStars Blogger Tourney very quickly. About a half hour in I had built a decent stack around $3000 and called a raise of $250 from a serial raiser in early position. Blinds were still $50 and I had QQ. His freqency seemed to indicate a raise with any Ace or face, so I was prepared to push on an all under flop. The flop came QJ6. He pushed all in for his $4K before I could. Since I had the nut at the time it was an easy call. He showed AK and the Ten came on the river to give him an early lead in the tournament. I checked later and he didn't even make it into the top half of finishers. I felt like Oliver Hudson.

The pain of early elimination was alleviated by an early dinner with my parents, who treated Mrs. Bogey and I to Ted's Cafe Escondito, the best Mexican Restaurant I have ever had the pleasure of visiting. I had Pork in Salsa Verde and it is absolutely unparalleled. Everything is as fresh as can be. I had it with Pappas Mexicanas and Corn con Crema, and the combination was heavenly. The setup there is incredible too, with the best salsa I have ever tasted, along with warm flour tortillas made moments before you eat them.

We returned home in plenty of time for the $3K New Depositors Main Event at Absolute Poker that King Lucky and I struggled to qualify for by coming in the top 200 out of 377, with 100 no shows. There were 1400 entries and payouts started at 63. Only 700 or so no shows in this one. I exited early again but I can't even remember the details. I'm sure it was a donkey play that I've blocked out of my mind. KingLucky played excellent poker and managed to make the penultimate payout level. First 11 places got $75, $60 paid out to 27 places and King Lucky got 25th. He did get lucky a couple of times. Once he was all in with K9s vs KK and turned a flush. Later he was all in with 95s vs 99 and rivered a wheel. Both times I think he was all in on the big blind and more than tripled up to stay alive.

While sweating KingLucky, who moneyed in another freeroll at the same time, I finished my promotion at Full Tilt. In about another hour of play I won $150, received $10 in bonus from Full Tilt's 100% deposit bonus and completed 200 Full Tilt Bonus Points to qualify for $60 worth of PSO points.

I know most of you already have Full Tilt Poker accounts, especially those of you that got the offer that I got. If you don't, please click on my link, but click on my PSO link instead and sign up for Full Tilt Poker through Poker Source Online. You'll get the 100% deposit bonus, but you'll also get a free prize from Poker Source Online like Poker Tracker or Poker Tracker Omaha. And you'll clear the PSO bonus in no time at all.

Being famous must be nice

The best thing about being a blogger is the fame you get. Granted it's the smallest increment of fame you can get, but when someone says "I read your blog" it really feels good. It's even better when someone reads your blog and gives you something for free. It's rare, but it does happen.

But if you're Famous Movie Director Kevin Smith and you blog about playing poker all the time, you get this:



Yes, that's a custom made poker table based on the movie "Chasing Amy," Smith's third and most critically acclaimed movie. The movie's main character is named Holden McNeil, so some dedicated fan built a poker table for him based on the theme "Hold Em McNeil."

Sheesh! It's like Roseanne said back when she was funny, "When I was poor, nobody gave me shit. Now that I'm a millionaire, everything is free!"

Poker Comic #44

So much for Wednesdays only! Brought to you by Poker Source Online. Click Here for great bonuses and free gifts, just for playing poker!

Mo Money

Made the money again in another MTT at PokerRoom.com. Left in 21st place (of course the money went up at 20th place) when my AK ran into AJ. All in pre-flop, and the flop comes AQJ. No K no T and I'm out. $5+$.50, 477 players in attendance. I use the term "players" very loosely.

I figure there must be a way to buy into these things with players points or something, because at least half the field was playing it like a freeroll, or worse.

Very early in the tournament I doubled up with AA vs QQ. I had close to the starting stack of 1500 and my opponent hand over 3K, so my double up brought him back close to the starting stack. Yet it was still enough to make him tilt his way out of the tournament, going all in on every hand after that until he was gone. What makes a player do that? He's still above the average chipstack, and yet he decides "If this is how the tournament is going to be, I'm going to bust out intentionally!"

Later on, a guy is kind of talking out of his ass about how much money he makes playing poker, and how he's just killing time until a bigger tournament starts. He says "Want me to go all in on the next hand?" I say "Sure." He doesn't go all in and I say "I knew you wouldn't do it." He says "Oh yeah?" and on the next hand he says "I have Q4" and goes all in. Someone calls him with KT and sure enough, he had Q4 and takes a powder. Needless to say I was impressed. What was that guy trying to prove?

There were 250 players gone in the first hour. More early donkey action that you can almost imagine. KQ is the NUTS in this tournament, or so you would think by the number of times someone calls all in with it, or even worse, re-raises all in with it.

What is it with the fishy fascination with KQ? I see more stupid plays with that hand than any other, outside of A2 maybe.

At least I'm still doing well in MTTs. The only hand I went in behind was 77 vs 99, and after I raised it was only a few chips more to call the all in from a small stack. I figured he had me but I was pot stuck. Other than that I had a lead on most every hand I played, with very few coin tosses. On one hand I had AKs vs 99. The flop came TTJ with two of my suit, so I had outs galore(21!), and caught on the river. I can't think of another coin toss or hand where I wasn't better than 3/2 favorite.

Watch out for me on Sunday!

Poker Comic #43

Poker Comic Sponsored by Poker Source Online. Free Amazon Gift Certificates, just for playing online poker!

Formatting

Do you guys think I should keep the Poker Comic up all week by putting it above the blog title (like the "Donkeys Always Draw" graphic was for so long) or should I do what I have been doing and let it drop off the page after a day or so? I don't really want it to look like an advertisement, but since it is sponsored it might be the nice thing to do. Would it be too annoying to see the same comic for a whole week?

The Height of Simplicity

I played in the easiest tournament I've ever entered last night. I was talking to KingLucky on the phone and he said that Absolute was about to start a tournament for "new depositors." He wasn't sure if he qualified so he tried to enter it and it allowed him in. So I cranked up the Absolute software and tried it myself, and I was allowed in too. I had deposited in the last week or so, and I guess that counted. I originally opened my account over a year ago, so "new" depositors is probably a bad name for it, it should be "recent depositors."

At any rate, the tournament was a qualifier for the "new depositors main event" tournament on Sunday. All you had to do was make the top 200, and the tournament would end and you would automatically be entered into the Sunday main event. The total enrollment for this tournament was 377. So more than half the entries would be winners. Piece of cake.

Last through 177 freerolling idiots? Easy. Except that things are a bit different at Absolute. You start with 1500 chips in round one, and if you haven't played a hand, INCLUDING FOLDING ONE HAND, by round two, you are removed from the tournament and your chips are removed from the table. Apparently around 70 people didn't know this because they sat out the entire first level and BANG, we were almost halfway to the money after the first 10 minutes.

20 minutes later the rest of the all-in monkeys knocked each other out and I was qualified for the Sunday $3000 tournament. By far the fastest and easiest multi-table tournament I have ever played. I won one hand, when my AK made Aces full of fives and I called an all in by a guy with K2. I assumed a split, but called just in case the guy was a moron. Yes, he could have had a pair of fives, but I would still have had plenty of chips to make the money. I was glad to do my part to get everyone to the money faster by knocking this dumb ass out.

The Sunday main event should be fun, considering the level of competition. I think they are having one of these qualifiers per day, so there will be 1200 people in the main event. If you have an Absolute account, you might want to jump in for a laugh.

Duggle is ON FIRE

I have really bad news for those of your participating in the PokerStars Blogger Tournament. I am on FIRE in MTTs lately.

First it was Saturday Night/Sunday morning vs. 199 people in a rebuy tournament at Absolute Poker. Despite never taking a a rebuy vs 308 rebuys for my opponents, I made the final table, losing a coin toss to come in seventh.

Then on Sunday vs 428 people on PokerRoom.com, I took fourth place, netting $170 for a $5.50 buy in. I got as high as second in chips at the final table, but lost to the chip leader when I flopped top pair with K9 and a flop of 987. He flopped a straight. He was raising with any face card out of his small blind, so I was sure he didn't have A9 or TJ. I went through all the possible hands I was afraid of before going all in, but completely forgot about 56. The biggest leak in my game is overplaying my blinds.

I was lucky to make it to the final table place at all. After the third break I was all in on my big blind with 21 left, but flopped trip queens to quadruple up. I won a few very lucky hands after that too, including A7 vs KK, rivering trip sevens. KK held up very infrequently in this tournament, and I can't remember the last time time I won with them in a showdown. Lately I'm happy to win the blinds with them.

My strategy was very simple in these tournaments...win all my coin tosses. Actually that's not true, but I did beat a lot of people who call with Ax vs my middle and larger pairs. The incredible thing to me is how people call all-ins with A2 and a significant amount of their stack at risk. Maybe it's understandable when half the time the all-in raiser is either on a stone bluff or with KQ, but man is it nice to ALWAYS get paid off on your big hands. You can fold 50 hands in a row, go all in UTG and get called by A9. Ridiculous.

Anyways, if my MTT luck continues as it did this weekend with two final tables in as many tournaments, you all are cooked in the Stars tourney. Consider yourself warned!

Error in Judgement

Well, after working until 1am, I was kinda cranked up for some poker after reading those tasty blogs all night...so I see a rebuy tournament at Absolute Poker starting at 2am.

"What the hell!" I think to myself, and buy in, taking the rebuy right away to give myself 3000 chips.

Well, now it's 6:20am and I'm still fricking playing this godawful thing. Second break, I'm at the final table with seven left. Mostly idiots, which rebuy tournaments tend to bring out. Most everyone at the table has said they need to finish higher than 5th just to make money. I never rebought once after the initial doubleing, and the double add on at the first break.

I'm the short stack with 55K chips after calling a raise with 88 and folding to a K high flop, neither player had a K of course, but I had to figure one of those morons wasn't bluffing. I should have just gone all in pre-flop, one of those idiots surely would have called, but I was at an inbetween spot with my stack in relation to the blinds... Now that the big blind is 10K, there's not much doubt left anymore.

Will update tomorrow, hopefully, looks like 7th right now. OOPS, JJ! Called by AQ, rivered the Q. 7th it is!

I've been called out

It's 12:15 AM Saturday Night/Sunday Morning and I'm still at work. It's a long story but I have to cover for my second shift guy. Normally I would NEVER stay up this late for anything except poker.

In my late night boredom, I'm wandering around bloggerdom and I see that I've been called out by SirWiffleBalls. Check his site for the specific challenge.

I've been especially hard on him lately, what with calling him "Titanic" and all. Undeservedly, because he is actually one hell of a poker player. One of the qualities that a poker player needs is the ability to play with "NO FEAR." And nobody exemplifies this better than The WiffleBat. The guy could have the mortgage on the line and still bluff without a bead of sweat. I'd be peeing down my leg if I tried to bluff with more than $100 on the line.

Anyways, if I actually going to play against SirF, (which is silly because we've played against each other probably a dozen times in the past) I'm going to need some good lines to try and put him on tilt. I want to know, if you were playing a heads-up challenge with the WiffleMan himself, what would you say to try tilt him?

Hit me with your favorite SirFWALGMan tilt lines. Best one gets.....something....if I can think of anything....give me a break, it's fucking late. Free sponsorship of the next Poker Comic, maybe.

More Casino Whoring Goodness

I forgot to mention in the new stuff yesterday that Poker Source Online has started a new bonus site for Casino Bonuses called Casino Source Online.

There's no referrals or anything, just some good exclusive deals on Casino Bonuses.

News....well, kinda olds

There have been some new developments in my small universe. Nothing earth shattering, but still, I should mention them here.

First, Poker Source Online has taken over the Internet Bonuses section of the 2+2 forums. (Hint: If you've never been to the 2+2 forums, you'll never find it by googling 2+2, try twoplustwo.) The forum was previously hosted by BonusWhores (that you can google) but the BW folks decided after a month that it was too much trouble and too much money for too little profit. It seemed like everyone at 2+2 was already a bonus whore anyway. Literally.

So, much like my comic sponsorship, PSO leapt in to take up the slack. They will probably continue the sponsorship for at least a couple of months. I was always hesitant to talk about PSO in the forum when BW was hosting it, so it's kind of nice to have the chains removed and be able to endorse the place openly and wholeheartedly. There are, of course, some negative people on there who had bad experiences with PSO. No business can please 100% of the people, but the one or two who dislike the place are usually exposed as idiots or crackpots. And their competition in the affilliate business aren't very happy with them either. Because they are getting STOMPED out of existence by a place that simply does it better.

There are a couple of new blogs I am reading that I probably should mention. One is Casino Ownage by Actyper. A long time Poker Source Online forum contributor has finally started blogging. There's lots of bonus whore goodness in there, especially on the casino side which I rarely touch.

Next is Another Poker Blog by Matthew/Kornholio. He's one of the seemingly zillion Canadians from Poker Source Online. PSO bought some ads in Canadian Poker Player magazine and boy did it pay off, because it seems like half their customers are Canadian. At least the most vocal. They loves them some poker in Canada, apparently.

Poker In Arrears by TripJax has the coolest graphic for his title than any other poker blog I've seen. And he has good content too! He's one of GCox's growing mafia contingent. Currenlty running the SNG challenge, which is fascinating to watch, and tempting to join into.

I like reading poker blogs of all kinds, from micro-limiters scraping it out at the penny-levels to the Poker Pros/Semis who have bankroll swings in the tens of thousands and don't bat an eye. But the ones that tend to hold my interest the most are the low-limiters, the $25-$100NL players, the $1/$2-$3/$6 players who grind away at the low levels, chasing bonuses and feeding the fish. Maybe it's just hubris. My title says I'm small time, and while I have taken some shit off people for it, I still feel like I'm small time and I don't think there's anything wrong with it.

I may be a small fish in a small pond, but I like it plenty.

Poker Comic #42

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I've had it

I've had it with Oklahoma Radio.

I guess I got lucky when a few weeks ago I found a radio station out of Enid Oklahoma that broadcast national sports radio that I could pick up on my way to and from work. It didn't even bother me that it was Fox Sports Radio, and then changed to Sporting News Radio.

But suddenly an AM country station is bleeding all over my sports radio station. There is an Oklahoma City local sports radio station, but it is the worst excuse for sports radio you have ever heard. I switched over to them out of desperation this morning. The last couple of days haven't been as bad as normal as I get to hear them whine and moan over the state of Oklahoma football. There's nothing like hearing a guy defend his pick that Oklahoma was going to beat Texas by three touchdowns....you were only off by 50 points! "Weyell...eeef theeese stupeeeed refereeeeees would have gotten the call right one this one play, the whole game would have gone deeeeffrent!" Right. 50 points different.

But this morning, in the middle of reading celebrity birthdays, the main player, the STAR of the show, says "Baseball Sucks." Nevermind we just got to see one of the most exciting set of games in division series history, and we got to see an 18 inning marathon that was decided by a hall-of-famer. No, mr "Sports Authority" is right, baseball "sucks." I'd much rather watch his favorite college football team play for 11 games per year, including those exciting Texas Christian Cupcakes.....which your team can't even beat. They even have an ex MLB player that does their afternoon show. And he's a dipshit too.

I'm done with them. It's over. I'm getting XM or Sirius Radio so I can never listen to those local fuckwits again. I'll never have to listen to them talk about their political agendas during a sports show again. I'll never have to listen to them say "those demmycrats in warshington" again.

Anyone have an opinion on XM vs Sirius? I'm open to any and all suggestions.

PokerRoom.com finished

I finished my promotion from Poker Source Online at PokerRoom.com with mild success. I would have done better except one hand where I bluffed away $45 with the Hammer. The donkey who later insisted he only played 30% VPIP called me all the way down with 33 unimproved.

I began to doubt the 30% number when later he called my pre-flop raise with T8s. Since the flop was A88, he probably thought after the flop that it was a genius call. Since I had AA, he probably thought differently after the hand was over and I had his whole stack. He tried to trap me. NH.

All in all a very positive experience at PokerRoom.com. They offer a lot of cheap and middle level buy in tournaments, and they move along very nicely. Plenty of ring game action whenever I wanted it, enough to do some basic table selection. The software was fairly nice. I did get disconnected once (my router was the problem) and when I re-connected a couple hands later they had given my seat away. That was kind of annoying.

I never tried the java version, the download version always ran very smooth for me. The attached casino and abundance of mac only users seems to provide a pretty good supply of fresh fish. The 40% buy-in bonus was nice because I cleared it at the same time I cleared the PSO Bonus.

I'm looking forward to getting the Nevada Jack's chips to give to my father-in-law for Christmas. They sell for over $200 a set on Ebay, so I'm expecting something pretty extraordinary.

A couple more things

I thought of a couple more things about the criticism of my blog.

The guy called me a Donkey. Well, he's right, but not for the reasons he thinks. I make Donkey plays all the time. If I didn't donk off my chips every once in a while, I'd be the perfect player. I'd sound just like Phil "If it weren't for luck I'd win all of these" Hellmuth.

Here's an example. I was playing in a Tournament at PokerRoom.com on Wednesday and got QQ in the small blind. The big blind was $400 and I raised to $800 (GOTCHA! It was a limit tournament) and got instantly called by the big blind. He didn't even take a second to think about it, just called. He was a very tight aggressive player, so red flags should have gone up all over the place. The flop came with an ace. Now any non-donkey would have said "oh well" and let the hand go. But I didn't consider his stack size much of a threat, and I played him down to the river to see his AK.

Total donkey move, if you consider that I prevously had plenty of chips to cruise into the money, which was actually pretty significant. Losing that pot took me out of the money. All the extra chips I lost on the turn and the river probably would have been plenty. I left myself in a spot where I had to win a pot pretty soon, and that didn't happen.

The point of telling that story is that I, of course, am a donkey. I don't recall EVER denying the fact that I am a donkey. EVERYBODY (Hellmuth excluded) makes a donkey play now and then. Even if min betting the flop when I caught a full house is a donkey move, I don't think it invalidates the advice that min-betting and min-raising pre-flop is ALMOST ALWAYS a bad move. There are no absolutes in poker. If someone tells you that something is NEVER the right move, or something else is ALWAYS the right play, they are simply clueless. Situationally, any move can be the right move. (Except maybe checking in position on the river with the nuts. I've seen it many times, but I still don't get it.)

But just because I call people donkeys and idiots doesn't mean that I am immune to acting like a donkey or an idiot. Fuck, I do it all the time! Anybody who says they don't is a FUCKING LIAR.

I also take issue with the fact that I chastise people for min-betting and min-raising, yet I "post about hands all the time where I min bet and min raise." I searched through my blog and didn't see any NL hand histories where I min-bet or min-raise. (I assume he's talking about pre-flop min-raises, because there's NO WAY IN HELL I am against min-raising after the flop. Min-raising the turn with the nuts is a great play IMO, because it almost ALWAYS gets called, even by a bluffer.)

Since I have been playing limit poker almost exclusively for the last few months, maybe he is reading limit hand histories and seeing me min-bet and min-raise all the time? And he is just too much of a MORON to realize that I'm talking about limit poker?

Because in NL ring games and tournaments, I very rarely min-bet, and almost NEVER min-raise pre-flop. Unless you are in a tournament and the blinds are big enough that a min-raise pre-flop is actually a significant amount to the other players based on their stack size, it's a bad play. But I don't even mean to take credit for that evaluation. I actually learned it from TJ Cloutier. So maybe that guy doesn't have an issue with me at all. Maybe he needs to take it up with TJ.

Update: Yesterday he added to his list of blogs he "hates to read." Choice number two was The Blogfather. I feel honored not only to be included in such company, but to actually be listed ahead of him? I am not worthy.

I've been destructively criticized!

Using Shelly's little "who links to me" tool I discovered a blogger who linked me yesterday...unfortunately he didn't have too many nice things to say. Fair enough. I criticize pretty harshly, and should expect some critcism myself. But this guy missed the mark. Talk about totally missing the point, this one zoomed right past his cranium.

Here we go, starting with his title:

Today I start my list of blogs I hate reading

You "hate" reading my blog? Why do you do it? Did my blog become required reading for some bizarre college course? Who is forcing people to read my blog? Surely some cruel villain.

“A few hands after this genius lays down all this wisdom, I get a pair of sevens in the hole at our $50NL table. I call to see a flop of 878. I slow play it, and it checks around. Turn is a K, I min bet, get two calls and two folds. River is the case 7. I bet $1, double the minimum, and get one call.”
The above quote is from http://goberude.blogspot.com He is a donkey. The above hand is just a glimpse into how much this guy donkeys it up. This guy talks and talks about how he hates min bets and min raises in his blog and about how every time someone min raises “baby Jesus cries” Despite all this talk (and it is exactly that TALK) he posts about hands all the time where he min bets and min raises.

Beyond not knowing how to correctly quote someone in blogger, this guy totally missed the point that I played the hand weak ON PURPOSE. The problem with min-betting and min-raising (which I never did in this hand, and min-bet only once) is that it is incredibly weak and invites people to play back at you. HELLO? I wanted someone to play back at me. I was INVITING a bluff, desperate to get paid off on my monster hand. Even though this is BASIC level one thinking, it is obviously over this guy's head.

One of the turn offs to reading a blog is contradiction………it is bad enough to sit at a poker table with someone who does the opposite of what they say, it is 10 times worse to read about it. So to GoBeRude I give your blog 4 turds out of 4 because it sucks big time.

There's the mature critcism I was hoping for. I maxed out the "turd" scale!

Now let's address the fact that this guy missed the point entirely! I could have (and maybe should have) just said I got quads and got no action despite my desperate attempts to induce someone to play back at me, but I thought that was TOTALLY OBVIOUS by the way I played it, so I didn't feel like I needed to spell it out for folks. I really need to stop overestimating my readers.

The point was that some tinfoil-wearing moron took this as PROOF that hands are juiced, even though nobody played back at me. It is actually evidence that the hands aren't juiced, because someone would have a boat or some other playable hand to increase the rake. ZOOM, right over this astro-physicist's head!

I did leave a comment on the guys blog thanking him for the link....and to my non-suprise I am apparently the first non-spam comment this guy has ever gotten, even though he has been blogging since July.

Oddjack reprinted the exact same post, and THEY got it. Maybe they just like the "online poker is rigged" idiots out there too. But at least they didn't totally miss the point of my ramblings.

When I wrote for a newspaper they said never write beyond a 6th grade reading comprehension level because you will alienate a certain percentage of the circulation base. I guess this guy is one of the idiots they were talking about. I'm sorry, but I'm still going to assume some level of poker ability in my posts. Maybe guys like him can just enjoy the comics.

Poker Comic #41

Poker Comic brought to you by Poker Source Online. Nevada Jacks Poker Chipset FREE, just for playing poker!

Remember, if you want to see all the Poker Comics, scroll down and use the new Archive List on the right!

Well, my deal with Noble Poker ran out. Apparently I didn't generate enough new accounts. If any. Tons of clicks, but not sign-ups.

Luckily, Poker Source Online is here to take up the slack! Go PSO!

Seriously, I have referred dozens of people to PSO, and not a single one of them has regretted getting involved over there. Some of them have gone hog wild and done all the promotions as fast as possible. Most are more leisurely about it, but all of them love getting free stuff like Poker Chips, Poker Table Tops and Gift Certificates, just for playing poker online. Which they were doing anyway.

The best current deal (in my opinion) is the Nevada Jacks Poker Chip deal. You do one promotion, at Party Poker, Titan Poker or PokerRoom.com, and you get a chip set that retails for $190. Now they've added Paradise Poker and Absolute Poker, and those deals are as easy to complete as the Party Poker promotion. You have to be a first time real money player at any of those sites.

If you decide to give PSO a shot, please remember to say that DuggleBogey sent you!

The tinfoil hat squad

It astounds me how people claim that online poker is rigged. Even more astounding, they claim it WHILE PLAYING AT A TABLE WITH ME ONLINE.

Rocket fucking scientists. I got a 10 minute lecture on how hands are "amped up" on PokerRoom.com last night. I led him on a little bit, by saying "Really?" and "Are you sure, because I wouldn't want to play on a site where it was rigged." I think I acutally said "You'd have to be STUPID to play at a site where you actually thought they did that."

"Rigged" is a very fine line to these people. They'll say it's not actually "rigged," but the hands are somehow "higher" to increase the action. So not only are they STUPID enough to think that the sites are cheating, they are EVEN STUPIDER to think that the cheating is not "really cheating." Even STUPIDER than that, they think that they can beat a cheating site.

"You just have to adjust to the difference," is his response. "More like adjust your tinfoil hat," was mine.

A few hands after this genius lays down all this wisdom, I get a pair of sevens in the hole at our $50NL table. I call to see a flop of 878. I slow play it, and it checks around. Turn is a K, I min bet, get two calls and two folds. River is the case 7. I bet $1, double the minimum, and get one call.

Albert Fucking Einstein says "See, the hands are higher." I say "Bullshit!" (No censorship on PokerRoom.com's chat) "If the hands were juiced, someone would have had the eight!"

His response "Nevermind."

I guess I'm glad all these conspiracy theorists are out there. Because they expose themselves as MORONS, and that lets me know that their money is easy pickings. My old boss used to say, "Do you realize that almost half the people in the world are below average intelligence?" I'm sure would have said median, if he was just a bit smarter.

Tumbleweeds

There are literally tubleweeds in my office. I don't mean there aren't very many people here, I mean I walked in the door and had to step around a couple of tumbleweeds. There are often tons of them outside the door here in windy Oklahoma, but somehow they have made their way inside today.

This weekend I started a promotion at Poker Source Online that was just too good to pass up. I deposited $100 at PokerRoom.com, and after I earn 400 Poker Points, I will receive a set of these:





The chips cost $190 for a set of 300, so they should be something pretty special. I am planning on giving them to my father-in-law for christmas. You can do the promotion at PSO if you haven't had an account at PokerRoom.com, Titan Poker or Party Poker. I very much doubt if anyone reading my blog doesn't have an account already at Party Poker, but PokerRoom and Titan might have a shot. Especially Titan, except those that used Iggy's code for his tournament. The reviews of the chips from people who have done the promotion already make them seem like the best chips money can buy.

400 points at PokerRoom isn't going to be difficult. You get .7 points for every $1 in rake, and fractional amounts count. So if a pot is raked $.20, you get .14 points. I decided to do this whole promotion playing No Limit Hold Em. I've been playing limit so much lately it has gotten tedious. NL is definitely more exciting, but of course carries more variance. I lost a pretty big pot when I had 25h in the big blind, flopped the flush and paid off UTG who had A4h. But I'm still ahead of where I started thanks to AA vs KK all in for $50.

The new rake structure at PokerRoom.com actually makes it tougher to complete this at NL. Instead of the max rake at a given table being $3 like most sites, it is twice the big blind. So I'm playing $50NL where the big blind is $.50, so the max rake is $1. The most points I can get in one hand is seven-tenths of a point. Even when the monkeys go all in pre-flop for $50 each when they both have AJ (happened twice yesterday.)

Still, I played two tables for about three hours and got almost 100 points completed, and watched football the entire time. Kansas City apparently finds it tough to win when they spot their opponents three touchdowns off turnovers.

If you're looking for some really special poker chips, and a really great deal on getting them, check out Poker Source Online for this great new promotion. They are only allowing 10 of these promotions per day, so it might take some patience. It did for me, I tried clicking on the banner about 6 times before I found a day where all the offers hadn't been taken already. Hopefully my patience will be rewarded, like it usually is at the poker table.