Tuesday, October 04, 2005

The tinfoil hat squad

It astounds me how people claim that online poker is rigged. Even more astounding, they claim it WHILE PLAYING AT A TABLE WITH ME ONLINE.

Rocket fucking scientists. I got a 10 minute lecture on how hands are "amped up" on PokerRoom.com last night. I led him on a little bit, by saying "Really?" and "Are you sure, because I wouldn't want to play on a site where it was rigged." I think I acutally said "You'd have to be STUPID to play at a site where you actually thought they did that."

"Rigged" is a very fine line to these people. They'll say it's not actually "rigged," but the hands are somehow "higher" to increase the action. So not only are they STUPID enough to think that the sites are cheating, they are EVEN STUPIDER to think that the cheating is not "really cheating." Even STUPIDER than that, they think that they can beat a cheating site.

"You just have to adjust to the difference," is his response. "More like adjust your tinfoil hat," was mine.

A few hands after this genius lays down all this wisdom, I get a pair of sevens in the hole at our $50NL table. I call to see a flop of 878. I slow play it, and it checks around. Turn is a K, I min bet, get two calls and two folds. River is the case 7. I bet $1, double the minimum, and get one call.

Albert Fucking Einstein says "See, the hands are higher." I say "Bullshit!" (No censorship on PokerRoom.com's chat) "If the hands were juiced, someone would have had the eight!"

His response "Nevermind."

I guess I'm glad all these conspiracy theorists are out there. Because they expose themselves as MORONS, and that lets me know that their money is easy pickings. My old boss used to say, "Do you realize that almost half the people in the world are below average intelligence?" I'm sure would have said median, if he was just a bit smarter.

4 comments:

Irritable Male Syndrome said...

Quads is the impossible Holy Grail of hands. It happens, what, once every 5 trillion hands? I can understand why the guy is so skeptical. =)

Unknown said...

Surely someone had KK.... like 50 hands ago.

Has Pokerroom improved their stability? I played there for 4-5 months with very wonky connection problems on their part.

DuggleBogey said...

I've only been playing for two days there, but it's been fine. Some slight lagginess a couple of times, but no connection issues

Jestocost said...

I love how you can go play on ANY site and someone will be saying the same things: "That's UB" or "Friggin' PokerRoom is a joke." Wherever you're playing now is screwed up and the other sites are better, until you get to those sites and hear virtually identical comments.

Pokerroom runs pretty smooth most of the time. They were pretty nasty last year and had a few problems back around May-June of this year, but seem to be OK now. The software can be a bit laggy, but certainly not as bad as UB has been lately. I have no trouble playing the no download version either, although you do give up some features.