Monday, March 20, 2006


Just because a quote from you appears in a "You might be a donkey if" column, it doesn't mean you are a donkey. I know for sure that people's quotes have appeared here who AREN'T Donkeys. I'm sure if I read through my entire blog, I could find plenty of quotes from myself that are things that a Donkey might say.

Anyway, here's a few more goodies:

You Might Be A Donkey If you've ever said the following things in your blog:

I have decided to become one of those guys that makes a living playing on-line poker. Uh oh, danger Will Robinson...lots of people think you have to earn your way to become a pro, not just "decide."

I’ve seen the film Rounders with Matt Damon more times than I care to remember. Hmmm....definitely required criteria to become a pro...

My decision to go pro comes after losing my last dollar online yesterday. Wooh! This might go on the list as the WORST reason to become an online pro....I can't come up with something worse.

I am now 36 years old. Yes that’s correct 36 years old; broke and living with my Dad. You may not want to become a pro just because you don't have any other options.

I’m not a complete idiot. I have a University degree in Engineering. Maybe not complete, but you definitely have some partial idiocy going on."

Okay, this guy isn't really a donkey. I had high hopes after reading his first post that he'd be some great material, but he seems to have a pretty good head on his shoulders....but some of these comments in his first post make me want to weep.

It also felt good to just get knocked out of the tourney regular, and not be sucked out on like usual. It felt good? You must feel good all the time then.

I've got a bible on my table, and I've got a cross with my Savior on it right next to my wood stove. Why don't you take up Morman or some other stupid shit. In my experience, if you want people to respect your religion, it's not best to shit on everyone else's."

This would put me at my final goal of playing $1000 and higher by next winter. Even if you only make half your stack at these tables that's $500. And if you multiply $500 by 300 you get $150,000. I love a plan that includes ZERO losing days in an entire year.

After those beats I decided to play a sit and go. I stepped up to a $50 +5 which is one or two levels higher than I play. The pros agree, when you are on a losing streak, the best thing to do is to STEP UP from your usual levels.

So, the poker took a dive last night, and that usually means a big win is around the corner. Or it just means you are a shitty player who didn't get lucky last night. Same difference.

This guy definitely is a donkey, and I can count on at least one donkey-like statement from each one of his posts. To quote Felicia Lee:

Losers usually talk about how much they win, or how great they play. Winners usually say nothing, or downplay their ability.

Sure, there is a time and a place when good or great players should actually brag about their ability, but for the most part, they don't, and they shouldn't.

All this guy does is brag on himself, not only how he's the greatest poker player on earth, but the greatest PERSON on earth. His cluelessness knows no bounds.


vegaas said...

I love the YMBADI posts. I mentioned this to you last week at the first blogger tourney. I am sure I have made numerous donkey statements at my blog, I wonder if I will ever make the YMBADI roll. Fingers crossed.

Veneno said...

Too funny!

I'm the greatest in the

Jestocost said...

I'm still wondering if Kelly's got the goods…and what that really means if she does? I guess we'll just have to stay tuned.

DuggleBogey said...

I this context, the only thing "the goods" could be is:

Too dumb to know she's dating a complete douchebag.

Felicia :) said...

But I wanted to be the donkey (whine)!

Okay, I'll settle for being the Pygmy Goat. They are cute and cuddly, and keep the pests out of the garden.

Mr. Friendly said...

The man is on a roll...

Did ever read about how he was going to make two grand in about ten days...

That, as Bania might say, is gold, Jerry, GOLD!

DuggleBogey said...

You're leaving out the gold, Mr. Friendly!

He was going to make two grand in ten days in order to go to Phil Hellmuth Poker Camp!!!

THAT'S the money shot!

Mr. Friendly said...

I stand corrected sir.